My sister is dating my ex-boyfriend

One of our readers wants your opinions on this matter, here is the situation:

My sister is dating my ex

Me and my younger sister are about two years apart. We have always shared everything except for the obvious, boyfriends. I know my younger sister have always looked up to me but our choice in men have always been different. I have always been attracted to the nice guys, the ones that are school oriented, shy, quiet type, whereas my sister she has always been attracted to the loud obnoxious type, sorry no other way to describe them.

Well after my sister saw how nice my ex boyfriend was to me, she started to become interested in these type of guys, the nice guys or maybe just my ex. After me and my ex decided that the best thing would be for us to go our seperate ways, my sister decided to go after him and I’m not quite sure how it is I feel about this. I’m not even sure if she was pursuing him while him and I were together.

What should I do if my sister is dating my ex boyfriend?


Read the Comments below and leave your comment too!


  1. my name is kim and I have been with man for 23 years we separated 3 years ago never got married. we have a 14 year old and I just found out hes dating my baby sister. my sister always wanted what I have. shes into drugs and he is… this is not normal for our 14 year . he wants my support no way in hell can I support this. this hurts me so bad he couldn’t fine anyone else it had to be my baby sister. were going through a custody battle and shes try to sisck her nose in our family issues… I have not seen her in 17 years and theres reason for that. shes a crack head and she steals please give me advise on this my lawyer is working on this. I will win on this its just the point… its nasty.

  2. Help?!?!

    My sister dated this kid for a day when they were in year 8. They talked on and off for the next 6 or so years. They both dated different people in that time. They are very different people and a relationship probably wouldnt have worked with them. Anyway, he’s always been her ex and i have never thought about him as anything more! But at a party we started talking and we got along INCREDIBLY well and the conversation just flowed so easily! Anyway secretly he gave me a few kisses and naturally we had been drinking so even though I knew what i was doing was wrong i was blaming the alcohol even though i was having a lot of fun!! Anyway he texted me the next day and we started texting all day, every day. After a week, my sister found out we had been texting and she went ballistic!!! me and my sister have never really gotten along that well but i didn’t ever want to hurt her. I never thought she would care so much that i was talking to him. Anyway she told me to stop and i did, well i tried and it was one of the hardest things to do!! so for the past week we have been talking in secret. I HATE that i am hiding it its really out of my nature but i really really like talking to him and i can seriously see a long future with him! I have never met anyone like him! i have no idea what to do?!?! i want it to be out in the open that i am talking to him, but i hate everyone judging me and giving me all these negative thoughts. I thought maybe with time she would accept it and be happy for me (she can be dramatic about a lot of things!) but its really hard. Im thinking i might just say Forget it to all the people who want to judge me negatively, i really like him and he really likes me. But i still want a relationship with my sister! What do i do?? Any advice??? xx

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  4. Its scares me though cuz I’m on d shit right nw…I pray mine works out Perfect;but I’m still hiding mine cuz she still love d guy!but she dumps d guy 4 another….nd dat oda one dissapointed her…now she want to come back…bt is not working!

  5. Ok.. So I got with my sister Ex-fiancé but before u hate me, let me tell u my story.. Me and my sister had an ok friendship .. And by saying that I mean she only thought of me when she needed something.. Like picking up her kids or being her babysitter. This just didn’t apply to me also to our other 2 sisters and our own mother . Anyhow she was with her ex for 2yrs but at the same time she was seeing someone else and having a long distance relationship .. Well I never told her anything all I would tell her is “it’s your life and u choose who makes u happy”.. Well her ex was a great guy, father and friend. He was always there for the family no matter if he had 30 other things to do. Well my sister leaves him and get with the “other guy”. They were planning a wedding and were ” in love” with eachother. So 1 1/2yr later, I decided she was totally over her ex since she moved on and got married etc. Her ex was bf with my older sisters husband so regardless he was still going to b around. We both decided to start dating but we didn’t want to keep it a secret. So I called my mom and asked her what she thought of the whole situation. Mom was ok with it. She told me as long as I was happy. So then I called my sister and told her.. All HELL broke lose . .ahe told me I’m a disgrace and that she will not allow her children to be around nasty people like us and that she hopes my kids don’t grow up like me. She is a ” Christian ” lady bit then she was calling me all kinds of names. I told her that she moved on so why was she so upset?? I told her she’s always been selfish and inconsiderate.. Well little did I know my older sister stop talking too. I was awkward since her husband was BF with the ex. The only people that accepted this was my mom, 2 brother n laws, and 1 sister. I was really upset that my 2 sisters would b selfish and not consider my happiness .. Me and the ex stayed together for 3 months . Not bcuz it wasn’t working out but for the reason that I was isolated out of my nieces and nephews lifes. I still miss him. He was so great for me but I believe my 2 sisters shouldn’t of acted like that. My advice would be ” expect to lose the people close to u if your willing to take a chance”. The odd thing about this is that they r talking to me now and my older sister talks to me and to the ex like if she never didn’t accept us and my selfish sis still cont to be the way she always has been.. What’s funny is that both of them don’t get along even after they both teamed up on me.. Life goes on!!

    • lol,that’s funny and it’s selfish of them to isolate you. But one thing you said that is really good is the advice ” expect to lose the people close to u if your willing to take a chance”. Thank you for stopping by Hilda.

  6. Why would you care? Clearly you love your sister and clearly you no longer are with this guy, so why would you care if she found happiness with someone you dont even want. Its not like you own him after you broke with him. Its life move on.
    My ex dumped me like I was trash said I was too nice. Now I am dating her sister its working out great. When my ex confronted me about it I told her the same thing I wrote you. She has never said anything more about it and the rest of the family is ok with it.

    • Thank you for stopping by and sharing Johannes and to a certain extent I kinda agree that you can’t really tell the person who to date. But I can also see how that can pose a problem for the sisters because that can start some big feud among them. Would you care if your ex all of a sudden started dating your brother??

  7. my sister is dating my ex it hurt so bad, I want her out of my life now, last night i read a text he sent her and that hurt she don’t know I know they are seeing each other they are keeping it a secret. I think we need to seprate from each other now, she know how I feel about him she is all about herself I would never do her like that oh I hurt so bad. we dated 2 yrs. I love him

  8. hookin up with yor ex is like reading the same book and expecting a diff ending. You could not make it work with him, why freak out when your sister gives him a try… But where there are kids concerned, hooking up with your sister’s children’s father is wrong on soo many levels.

  9. I want 2 be with my ex( my sisters bf) I dnt hav feelings for my current bf the only reason I’m still with him is becoz of our children. But me and my ex wants to be together! My sister won’t just leave him tho?

  10. Hi 2Shy, the questions, are the person you are currently with are you just willing to drop that person and move on? And your sister as well will she just do the same? There’s really no quick fix for this situation. Try to answer these questions and maybe that will make things clear for you.

  11. Ok I’ve been dating this guy about 6-7 years ago, when I fell pregnant with another guy’s child but when my ex( sisters current bf) found out he wanted 2 fix things and I didn’t want 2 coz I was pregnant so he asked my sister out and they started dating but the whole time since they started dating we were seeing each otha, now I’ve got 2 kids and my sister got 1 from him? But now I really want him back! They are dating for 4years now and I’m also in a relationship of 6years! But I want 2 b with him and he wants 2 b with me plz help!!!!!!!

  12. Okay: This is my point of view. If my Brother dated my ex. I would not care. For this reason. Everyone is not meet to be together. It might have been meet for me to date a women in order for my brother to realize who he likes in a women. Simple as this. If I would have found my ex to be the one for me. She would not have been a ex in the first place. A man’s trash is always anther man’s treasure.

  13. So my sister and her boyfriend were together for only five months, not a serious relationship. He went to jail, and she cheated on him within a month of him going. He got out a month ago, and we started talking. We decided that we both have feelings for each other, and we are going to pursue a relationship. Now, I told my sister about this and she freaked out on me, saying that she still has feelings for him even though they have been broken up for almost 2 years and she now has a new boyfriend, and is seeing someone on the side. I was adopted at a young age, and yes, she is my half blood sister, but she has done grimy things such as steal money from me. So idk. Thoughts?

    • This has always been a touchy subject, we don’t choose whom we love or fall in love with or have feelings for. Now how does he feel about her, because you don’t want to be stuck in a love triangle. There’s always this loyalty that is expected but it’s really up to you to go for what you want and be ready to deal with the consequences that come with me.

  14. Ok so met a guy earlier on in the year, hes a couple years younger than me but soooo sweet. I instantly fell for him. He knew that my previous relationship was a very abusive one & i was NOT treated like i was supposed to. So he tried to make up for it when we first met. He did everything right, perfict gentlemen, told me i was beautiful all hours of the day. I mean he really won me over, i fell in love with him sooo easily but i made him wait a long time before we ever slept together even though i wanted it very very badly. He acted as if he wanted a relationship with me, i mean he was all about me all day every day. this guy was frign GREAT!!!!! well we both were working together during this, time went by things got ebtter, everything was perfict. he was very protective of me. it was amazing.
    I finally slept with him & let me tell you, best sex of my life. i was madly in love with this boy. i didnt care he was younger than me he said an did things no man has ever done. he treated me like a queen. Well after a few months things started changing, he started acting weird didnt wanna hang out with me, made up excuses, he was real whiney all the time. i could tell something was wrong! Then i was “late”
    yup i thought i was pregnant, waited several weeks until i even mentioned. AND he flipped of course, him being that young he was super scared. I ended up telling him it was a false alarm but it really wasnt. i was prego & i knew i was gonna have to do it on my own, he was too young & totally not capable of raising a child. So screw it. i ended up losing the baby. it took me a while to come clean to him about the real truth but i finally did. Things were wierd between us for a lil while on his part that is. i had to explain to him its all good, an then we started messing around again & talking alot more. i was ever hopeful! an this is recent might i add!
    Things were going great, i thought maybe just maybe we have another shot at trying this again, we have such a past together & my feelings are soooo strong for him. jeez i think about him every day!
    any how i went an hung out with some friends an he showed up. i of course brought my sister (who is 2 yrs younger than i) along with me. she got super drunk an acted like an idiot as usual. Well “jack” & i acted our normal selves, flirty all over each other wrestling around. it was great. i noticed my sister kept f’n txtn him in the same room right infront of me, he was returning her txts as well, an then when him & i would wrestle she would try an get in the middle of us. almost like she wanted him to touch her & shit. but i brushed it off. no biggie cause i knew who would be in his arms by the end of the night. and of course i WAS in his arms, we went out to his truck & hooked up. it was as amazing as ever. an then went back in an snuggled up to each other for the resta the night. next mornign we get up me an sis leave. they start txtn from one second they r talking about me the next they start flirting & shit. im driving the whole time thinkn your kidding me. so i drop her off at her crib & i go home myself. so then he starts txtn me about her an she starts txtn me about him.this shit happens soooo fast, all of a sudden they wanna talk like date talk! an she’s goin for it. an they are using me as the f’n match maker. then they start asking me is it cool. idc if i say yes its fine sure go ahead, hell no you are my sister you say NO. she knows how strongly i feel for him, an she knew him & i slept together tat night! wth is wrong with her??? but he kisses my ass like im his bff cuz he knows i can ruin whatever him & my sis are trying to pull & my sister has turned everything into a competition between us. i can tell its bothering her that him an i talk daily & i had him first. i still have strong feeling for him although i shouldnt. ill never sleep with him again thats for sure. my queston is should i let it go even though its SUPER f’d up on both of their parts or should i ruin it which id love to do! im thinking of cutting ties with both of them cause this is just too hurtful & theres NOOO way i culd see them together. id get sick & puke on the spot!

  15. I know how you feel. I lost the love of my life and my bestfriend because of my sister. its sooo hard they live with me and my mom and my sister. it hurts everytime i see them together. everytime i take a shower i cry my eyes out. im still in love with him. we only broke up like 5 months ago. and him and my sister been dateing for a year. well you can do the math. it hurts it hurts alot idk what to do about it. not to seem so mean i want them both gone!

  16. My sister has been dating my ex after my father put me in a mental institute a year after I was raped. My sister has made a career of using my trageties as spring boards to increase her wealth and to increase her fulness of life. It has been 10 years my ex put a restraining order on me so I can’t see him. My sister has lied about their involvement together and my mother has been lying about it too. Now we are in this unspoken war where my mother and my sister team up against me and try to take what is unconsicious and virtuous within me and put it on the outside so they can try it on and have new experiences. I go to counseling but have never been stable enough to get on my own feet. My sister makes lots of money, lives a full life, lives in NYC, and my ex also does the same. My sister told guest that I was someone who has to be taken care of. Now I do have to pretty much be taken care as my family keeps lying to me and putting me down constantly. I have even tried putting a restraining order on them. My ex has me twisted and my sister and mother both jump on his wagon. They are whores. The best advice I can give you is don’t be a whore and stay safe. Your sister will try to tell you to do things that will make you hate yourself, and to do things with men who are garbage because they are whores and they just want to be lazy and not do anything. Such as life. You should find a support group, build a network and stay away from those (in your case your sister) who benefit from your negativity and harm. Build a network who is smart enough to not buy into her bullshit twisted violent sex life.

  17. I’m sure I’ll get a lot of heat from this but oh well here goes…I’m engaged to my sister’s ex and they have a child together. Remember that whole rule that isn’t spoken of not dating your sisters exes… well my sister decided to date 3 of my exes during my life time and I let them all slide bc she was my sister and I thought it was what I was suppose to do. We grew up and she began baby sitting for (Jack), she lost her apartment and moved in with him, at some time during her 4 years of babysitting they had sex and she got pregnant had his baby; he ask her to marry him, she said no, he ask her a total of 7 times all getting the same reply. I talked to my sister often during this time she would always tell me how she was going out with this person or that person not something that a mother should have been doing nor that of a woman that was dating someone. I was engaged during this time to another man, (3 yrs) the whole time he was cheating on me I only found out after the fact; felt like the fool and then thought howJack must feel not knowing what my sister was doing. NO I didn’t rat her out, I stayed silent, however he arrived home early one day catching her in the act, he tossed her out and I can’t say i blamed him. When i found out my fiance at the time was cheating I left him got moved back got my own place, and it was by where Jack lived. Jack needed a new babysitter and I needed money (I was a single mother too), I began watching his kids, and we began spending more time together, we were happy together, but I never let it get sexual!!! When I finally seen my sister moving on, dating others and saying how she found someone she was going to marry I felt that enough time had passed obviously so now I could try to be happy with Jack. Things began slow I didn’t rush over and say lets get it on, but after almost 2 years of dating we had sex and I have a daughter by him now. While my family wasn’t thrilled and my sister wasnt thrilled in the beginning, we have been the happiest we’ve ever been. My family has grown to accept it, and my sister while she has her days she too has accepted it. So I think if they are happy then you should be happy for them, everyone deserves the desires of their hearts, as long as it’s not causing bodily harm to themselves or others no one should refuse them those desires.

  18. well all i can tell you is what happind to me really so here it goes …
    i was 15 i no tha seems 2 young but it aint anyway my sister was 30 n my ex was 18 me n him broke up about 10 months ago n found out tha they were both seing sum 1 but they both denied tha they were seing each other in the end i found out from my mum tha they were seing each other i was fuming and hurt. me and my sister were always close so i was like how cud she do tha 2 me 2 her own sister i wud do anythin 4 her and i didnt no what 2 do i cudent speak 2 her bwt it coz she aint tha type of sister she wudent do anythin bwt it n now we aint sed 1 word 2 each other 4 5 months and she is wiv him still but 4 the wrong reasons if u get me (sexual ways) i just thought that there is millions of guys in the whole world and she had 2 pick MY ex. i think tha is just wrong and she aint a gd sister if she can do tha 2 u so i just left them 2 it and iv never 4gotton what she has done to me from this day 4wad xx

  19. I can only speak from my experiences with this, and I’ll try to make it as short as possible. When my sister and I were younger we were always told to stay away from each others boyfriends (this included ex’s). However, when I started dating a boy whom we will call Jack and who I considered my first real boyfriend, we dated for almost 2 years before breaking up because I found my sister on top of him, both fully clothed but still It made me uneasy and I already had trust issues so we called it quits. Less than 2 hours after calling it off with him, my sister who is older than me only by a year and some months, began dating “Jack”, my parents found out and neither objected to the idea even though they seen it hurt me dearly. Although while I was saddened by the thought I knew that if my sister was happy then I should be happy for her and so there it was, I was happy for her. Now they obviously broke up after growing up and we both went on to find different people to date. Now this took place approximately 10 years ago. I started dating a guy who I thought was perfect until he began abusing me, I went to my family none of which wanted to help me because they felt money was worth more than the physical abuse I was enduring. Fast forward to today, during the past 2 years of my moving back to my home town, my sister who did me wrong in the past has broken up with her boyfriend for many reasons. Now I am dating him, he has 3 sons, I have one, while no one was pleased with us dating at first, after seeing how she had moved on and how he had moved on and how happy we were together, everyone has learned to accept it.

    So in the end, if you are really done with him you should be happy that he has found love rather it be with you or without you, you should be happy for him, and for your sister or whomever it is he may date and may marry in the future.


  21. wow .. this is a tricky one .. but the best thing to do right now is to sit back and watch it all play out cause later on your sister has to realize what she’s doing is wrong so she’ll be back asking for your forgiveness ..

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