I think it’s definitely time that we make that distinction. Would you consider dancing at a party with someone else the way you would be dancing with you partner cheating? Is looking at someone of the opposite sex when your partner is not around cheating? Or is it even ok to look at someone else?
My take on this is that I find nothing is wrong with looking as long as it doesn’t go beyond just a look. If all sorts of ideas going through your mind about what you can, or would or should do to someone like that then I think that can be considered cheating. Is talking to someone else other than your other half for countless hours cheating?
I think we all will have our ideas of what cheating is and for most as long as the significant other don’t sleep with someone else or even perhaps kiss with someone then it’s not cheating. Oh wait, how about if your significant other decides to go out with their “friend” something you would perhaps consider a date, would you consider that cheating? Let me know what you guys thinking cheating is and where do you cross the line in order for it to be considered a problem. Please feel free to comment below!
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Men can sweet talk you and you will believe it is true. Even if the actions are there they can be fooling you. If you a cop and do it for a living, you can fool anyone. I know ,it happened to me.
i'm glad u see where i'm coming from cristy...this has nothing to do with not trusting my man because if that were the case i don't think i could be with him. I just don't like the idea of sharing him in that sense.
You are absolutely right about that elisapoo. Some girls just know how to get a man if they want to, they know all the strategies (and the other way around). Even though, the man is strong, faithful and all that it can still happen. The best thing is to be extremely careful: Men be careful with the woman you hang out with and vice versa. It happens many time!!!!!!!!!! So don't be so sure that it can't happen to you! Anyways, as far as I am concerned I won't allow my boyfriend to go out with any girl anytime he feels like it.
I see what your saying Gasline, but why would I even want my man in that type of predicament. I don't have a problem with him hanging out with friends and what not, but I don't like the idea of him sharing one on one time, such as going out to dinner, movies, etc. with some other chic. That's something that him and I share and three is definitely a crowd.
Elisapoo, i understand what you are saying; it's your opinion, but i don't care about what the girl takes it for; all I care about is what's in my boyfrien's mind.If you take what girls think about your boyfriend's move, act etc... seriously you will get crazy. specially if your boyfriend is awesome, fine, he has the face and the body like they say. The movie "Obessed" by Beyonce is a good example of how triffling and pervert a girl can be and show that a man doesn't have to cheat if he doen't want to no matter what the situation is.
I see the point that you guys are making and trust is just a part of it. I can trust my man but I don't have to trust the girl he is going out with. I know how trifling some girls can be and sometimes some guys can be so oblivious to that. For them it may mean absolutely nothing and for the girl, she may see it as an opportunity.
DING, DING, DING, man I love this topic. lol. Gasline I understnad what you are saying about the compliment,but from what I know is that girls don't like too much compliments. That one compliment you may give her may be the ice breaker. I know you didn't mean actual McDonalds. Trust is a big thing, you may trust your boyfriend/girlfriend 100% and you may not feel comfortable with him/her spending one on one time with the opposite sex and that's understandable. I also understand what you guys meant by boy/girl fuel(fire) and gasoline(lol)yes that's 75% true because two people can be in a movie, even in the same hotel and do absolutely nothing. From personal experience, a group of us went to Orlando at one time and my homeboy was going with this girl and her sister wanted to go to, so I ended going to the movie with them to keep her company sorta, but I spent most of the time on the phone with my girl, one, I didn't really like the movie and I don't think there was anything for us to talk about really. So, elisapoo going to the movies I am not sure that will cause problem. But that was in my case, and most men are not me, so bare that in mind.
To comment about what elisapoo said. If I trust my boyfriend and he trust me ; we shouldn't have a problem. We are not going to take it as an habbit, but we both can go out. Nothing should happen if we respect eachother.
Anyways, I think it's personal. If in my mind going out is cheating I shouldn't do it;otherwise' I'm cheating.
When I said movie, McDonald,then motel, it was an illustration. I meant; they can go anywhere(doen't have to be movie or McDonald),but they end up in bed. You can compliment your opposite sex once in a while, but not every second, nor any compliment. O course women are include, we both cheat, men and women. The only difference is we do not use the same steps or strategies.
Ok..I have to interject here, having been in a relationship for a long time, I don't think I will ever feel comfortable with my man going out to a dinner or even a movie with any other chic, other than me. I don't mind him hanging out with a group of friends, but as soon as you start going on some one on one dates that indicative of something else. I really don't think that he would feel comfortable either if the roles were ever reversed. Hanging out with friends, that's cool, hanging out one on one with some other chic, trouble!
KIKI, whoever, a man or woman who leaves his/her partner for another one does not know what he/she wants. I consider that person like a passenger, who doesn't know where he/she is going. He/she would cacth any buss, get off catcth another, and so on. Untill he/she realises that he/she is not going anywhere, but it may be too late. And I agree with you on the going out part. Like I said; I do not consider going out with your opposite sex cheating, and you complete my thought by saying: "Be careful once it comes to going out!!!! It is really good that you go to public places, just for safety. That is the reason why they most of the time, consider men and women as fuel and gasoline." (Christelle Fleurius)
I have to agree with Rose on that one, there's not such thing as men are worst than women this happens on both sides of the fens. We all choose to do and not to do certain things. The difference is I think is that men will go after what they want and women will just stay around and have the men come up to her. So is there really a difference there, not really. Low selfesteem, high selfesteem, some times things happen which shouldn't really be an excuse. Being in a vulnerable state is always a gateway to cheat.
This comment is most likely for Rose! I do not like the fact that you say that both sexes are the same when it comes to relationship. You choose to cheat but it does not have to be that way. It is just a matter of self-esteem. Men do not have to cover their eyes for other females, they just have to be satisfied with only one girl. It is also about respect towards each other. If you respect you boy/girlfriend, you will never do something like and if it does happen, it will be by mistake. And about your second post, even if it is in his blood he can still change if he wants to. It is just a matter of mind set!! If he does not want to change, well you can still move on. Having oral sex with someone who is not your partner is 100% cheating. I even consider it worst than cheating!!!
wowwwwww.............. I loooooooooooooove that topic!!! Well, first of all, I understand that guys can look at other females but with a certain limit. Most of the time, when a male sees a female on the street, he is like " Dang, she's fine" BUT it can go up to:"I want to see what's under the clothes". I consider that cheating because once your mind is already messed up with that idea, you become loco. Sometimes, you become so obsessed that you start to give your girlfriend attitude. Most of the time, it leads to leave your current girl to be with the new one. And it happens a lot of time! As far as I know, the fact that you go on a "date" with someone other than the person you with, it is cheating. Because, a lot can happen on that date. however, I never said that you cannot go some places with the opposite sex if he/she is not your boy/girlfriend. It is just a matter of mind set. Somne people just go out to chill and have fun but it can lead to other stuff that you probably did not want to happen. So be careful once it comes to going out!!!! It is really good that you go to public places, just for safety. That is the reason why they most of the time, consider men and women as fuel and gasoline.
so if you wishing to have that other person while u wit someone else,i consider that as cheating. But i have two Question tho...if your partner was involved in a oral sex with someone,How would you consider this situation? would you forgive them and stay with them or forgive them and move on? Next one;Let say you with someone....ok let put it like this, i'm a female and i have a boyfriend but he is a the biggest cheater in earth..he just can't help it,its in his blood....and it become a disease in him and he just cannot stop cheating on me.in dat case wat my suppose to do?
Both sex are the same,no different.they both cheat when it come to relationship. And this is what i think about cheating; asking another female out is cheating. If you are in a relationship with someone and you telling that person that you love them. I mean I know you are going to see other females that you are going to like but at the same time, why can you man's close your eyes and not to check them out.Because this is how I see it.If i know that I have a man. And I go out there and see a very nice, cute, handsome man. Of course I am going to be like danmmmm!!!!!! he look fine, but I'm not gonna wish to have him instead of my man. The same thing goes for man.
I see what you are saying but if you take a girl to McDonald, that's not consider a date so it can't be cheating. lol, however, I do see where you are coming from. So if nothing was done sexually then there's no harm, or if there's no constant compliment then there is nothing wrong as well right? And what is that about especially MEN, what's your beef with men. You guys are as bad as men the only difference is that some men will act but women rarely acts, but with the right amount of pressure they'll do it too.
I do not consider looking at someone whom is not your partner, nor go out with sopmeone cheating. A normal person can not stop looking at the opposite sex. We will always see and say things like: She is cute, I like her hair style,the way she walks, dress etc..., I like his dread, he is cute, awesome etc... We can not call these cheating. For me you cheat is when after the movie you pass by McDonald then the motel, or when you pass your days and your nights in the phone telling her how cute and sexy she is. Or what you are thinking about when you look at her, even though I can not read your mind, the way you are looking can tell. Even that, if it is just for a second then you clear your mind, get over it. if you do not pass to action is not a problem. Especially men, they are always thinking, looking or saying things.